Killer of flow: During the revision process, which type of wording should a writer delete in a narrative essay?

DafnaCross

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I'm in the middle of revising my narrative essay for my creative writing class, and I just had a major realization. I printed out my draft and read it aloud (which my professor swears by), and oh my god, I could not stop noticing all the clutter. It was everywhere! Which got me thinking about that crucial question: during the revision process, which type of wording should a writer delete in a narrative essay? For me, the answer is crystal clear: FILLER WORDS. Get them out of here! 😤

You know what I'm talking about. Words like "just," "really," "very," "actually," "quite," "sort of," "kind of." They sneak into every sentence like little linguistic parasites. "I was really nervous" becomes just "I was nervous." "It was kind of dark" becomes "It was dark." The meaning doesn't change, but the second version is so much stronger! Reading my essay aloud made me realize how many of these weak words were diluting my story. 💪

But here's the thing I'm struggling with: is it always bad? During the revision process, which type of wording should a writer delete in a narrative essay universally, and what might actually serve a purpose? Like, if a character in my narrative speaks with filler words, shouldn't I keep them for authenticity? My dialogue needs to sound real, and people do say "um" and "like" and "you know" in real life. So maybe the rule is different for narration versus dialogue?

My workshop group pointed out that my internal monologue sections were full of hedging language—"I thought maybe I should probably leave"—and they said it made me sound uncertain as a narrator. They said to own my observations! If the narrator is remembering something, just say what happened without all the qualifiers.

So now I'm on a deletion rampage. My word count is dropping, but my sentences are hitting harder. In my amateur opinion: anything that doesn't do work. Every word should earn its place.

What are YOUR least favorite offenders? What words do you always search for and destroy when revising?
 
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Dafna, my creative writing professor had a rule: "Delete every adverb you can survive without." It's brutal but effective. "He ran quickly" becomes "He sprinted." "She whispered quietly" becomes "She whispered." The adverb is redundant.

My personal enemy is "that." Half the time it's unnecessary. "I knew that he was lying" vs. "I knew he was lying." Cleaner, faster, same meaning. I do a Ctrl+F search for "that" in every draft and delete at least half.

Your point about dialogue is spot on. A character who says "um" constantly is different from one who speaks in crisp, complete sentences. Those verbal tics are character markers. But the narrator? The narrator should be deliberate. Every word should matter.
 
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